Why Are We Here?

Outside my window the clouds are rolling past the rooftops at a rapid pace (for clouds, that is). I wonder where they're going. The sky is perfectly cerulean, and the puffy fragments of white that move in a direction where there must be something cool going on, remind me that all of us are dots on this vast landscape and, like the clouds, we each make the heavens beautiful.

But why?

I mean, really, why are we here?

Today it drizzled lightly and the wind blew my hair in my face. I watched my feet as they crunched on leaves the color of honey. The bottom of my pants were soaked but I didn't care. The feel of cold and wet on my skin made perfect sense. There was no one on Primrose Hill and Regent's Park was eerily silent. A perfect Fall day. At 1 p.m. on a Tuesday I realized that this is the universe and I am meant to live in it. But even more, to thrive in it. To smile in it, to dance in it, to love in it. To truly BE in it. Not just exist. Not just float in a pool of mediocrity. To swim.

To be here, in this far away country, tromping through the leaves and feeling the rain on my face, this is part of what I'm meant to do. Maybe I'm just wistful because I lost one of my best friends. Maybe I miss my grandparents. Maybe I miss the people I haven't met yet. Whatever it is, I think this is a perfect time for me to reflect on my life's purpose. Why am I here? I think, perhaps, it's to live. It's not to fret about the $20 salad I just had for lunch. It's to sit here, sipping my tea, looking up at the wandering clouds and remember everyone I love. Remember how, like those clouds, every one of us will drift in a direction away from something. Perhaps it's away from someone we love, or perhaps it's away from our city or our car or our cat. Maybe it's away from sadness or heartache. It seems strangely metaphorical right now. Those clouds. They never stay in the same spot, yet they are always right there, above us. You don't have to stand still. You can move and still end up exactly where you're meant to be.